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| How to Get Your Revenge Healthy |
How to Get Your Revenge Healthy. Revenge has its own pleasures, people say. I'm also sometimes happy when I manage to prank my friends who used to prank me.
But on a larger scale, is revenge really good for us? Is revenge the answer? Will revenge make us feel better? "Of course! They deserve it!" you think possible. No, no, of course not.
The desire for revenge is a fairly natural response when you feel wronged. If you're still in doubt, Evolutionary Psychologist Michael McCullough of the University of Miami says that the concept of anger and the desire to retaliate for someone's actions that hurt us has permeated people of all types of society.
"Hopefully she's okay," you say sarcastically (you must have said that, right? Maybe not). Yes, many things might make you want revenge, some things even make you wonder if you are overreacting to the situation so you want revenge?
Don't worry, it's normal to have a desire for revenge. Although the tendency to retaliate is shared by many people who don't like humiliation, are obsessed with power, or desire for social status, that's okay, we actually want revenge. What's more important for you to think about is that it's not really this.
How to Get Your Revenge Healthy, You Can Try
According to Dan Ariely, when someone wants revenge, the part of the brain associated with feelings of appreciation becomes very active. The greater the desire, the greater the impact, this creates feelings of pleasure and satisfaction.
David Chester of Virginia Commonwealth University also found the same thing, the part of the brain associated with satisfaction becomes active when someone wants revenge or has already got revenge.
The result is very satisfying, the emotional pain when someone is hurt can be immediately replaced with pleasure when taking revenge. According to Chester, acting aggressively after you are provoked is worldly satisfaction.
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| How to Get Your Revenge Healthy |
While revenge can have pleasurable effects, it is important to remember that revenge is a broad phenomenon with different effects, triggers, and side effects.
According to Eric Jaffe, when you get revenge and succeed, you sometimes think that when the person who hurt you understands that you are getting revenge (another aspect that makes revenge satisfying), you are done, you are satisfied.
What you sometimes don't realize is that sometimes other people will think your revenge is too much, and then it continues in a seemingly endless cycle.
Therefore, the actual act of revenge is something that you should think carefully about. If it's on a small scale like beating a friend in a game you're playing, maybe you can let your emotions take over.
But on a larger scale, revenge is like a double-edged sword. It is important for you, me, and all of us to be good at understanding emotions and feelings.
How to Take a 'Good' Revenge? When you don't seek revenge, you can tell yourself that "Well, it's not that big of a deal." and move on with your life.
Of course, this doesn't always happen that way. While time has proven to reduce your urgency for revenge, there are times when you may continue to feel compelled to seek revenge.
But you have to remember, when you take revenge, you have the possibility to keep thinking about it plus this revenge that you do can be dangerous for you.
Then what should you do? After meditating for so long, you still can't let go of the desire for revenge. Okay, it is okay. This means that it's a good idea to know the good side of revenge, so you can think about your decision further.
There are three forms of a good revenge function, according to McCullough. First, with revenge, the person who hurt you or someone else who did the same will have a deterrent effect when someone retaliates.
Second, after getting your revenge, you can "get the thumbs up" for taking revenge for a bad deed. The third is a little more complicated, but briefly explained, the effect of revenge can make you do good things.
A little tricky, the third. To put it simply, I'll give an example for the third part like this: You and your neighbors take turns on night vigils to guard your home from wild animal attacks. When you fall asleep during your shift, the beast kills your neighbor's family.
More Good Stuff: How to Heal Your Feelings After Being Hurt by Others
Your neighbors could blame you for your carelessness and think you killed their child. This threat of revenge will keep you awake when it's your turn.
That's the bottom line. It's not that I support you guys to always take revenge, it's just that you should always think carefully, the purpose of your revenge, whether you believe you should take revenge, and with the possible consequences.
Fortunately, our brains have the ability to engage in deep thinking about impulsive reasons and actions (in this case, revenge). I hope you always think twice, no, a thousand times before taking revenge.
Healthy revenge
There are a few things you should try when you want revenge:
1. Calm down and think rationally. Remember, the desire for revenge is often an impulsive feeling. Revenge is a dish best served cold so cool your head, think things through.
Then find out if it's true that the things that harm you that you experience can't be justified? Gather all the facts, tell the person who hurt you (if possible), maybe he or she can apologize to you.
2. Focus on the positive. Use the emotions you feel when you want revenge for positive things. Revenge with elegance: be successful. Improve yourself and Rise again and become stronger.
Look at past mistakes and ugliness and make them your strength. The energy you get from wanting revenge can be directed to positive things.
3. Even more extreme, believe that anyone can betray you. If you have believed and believed in it, when you are hurt, you will be better able to regulate your emotions. But don't make it a matter of trust for everyone, it's just that you need to doubt before believing.
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| How to Get Your Revenge Healthy |
Lastly, if you are seeking revenge, I hope you will rethink your decision, the way you seek revenge, and the effect it will have on you in the future.
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